Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize
