Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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