i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
