Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
