honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
