Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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