i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
