dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
he shaved USA in his pubs
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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