I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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