Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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