Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
