there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize