You can't motorboat a personality
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
