it's not cheating when I paid for it
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
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