they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
