you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
