there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
