Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
