You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize