I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize