In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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