Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
