At least make sure they are 18
Why
handjob tips. give me some.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize