it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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