I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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