seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
