do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
