I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
