whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
