She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
