She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
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