guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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