Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.

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(419): View more from Ohio

doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.

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(980): View more from North Carolina

I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!

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(713): View more from Texas

I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.

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(845): View more from New York

Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.

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