Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
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