I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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