it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
