yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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