i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize