Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(585): View more from New York

Even the bartender felt bad for me

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.

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(303): View more from Colorado

Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now

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(785): View more from Kansas

The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am

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(503): View more from Oregon

I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.

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(516): View more from New York

The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else

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(702): View more from Nevada

I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.

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(602): View more from Arizona

It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.

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