I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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