we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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