Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
