So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize
