I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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