On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Randomize
