I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
