He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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