I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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