Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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