so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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